Fruzsina’s Awakening

Kate (00:00)

Welcome back to the Awakening Conversations podcast. My name is Kate. I am here with my cohost, Amanda, and a very special guest joining us today. Fruzsina Szemzo.

So Fruzsina is a friend of mine. Actually we met when I lived in Hungary. She is still there. Fruzsina is Hungarian American, mother of two. Athlete, artist, intuitive channel and body worker. The path to Fruzsina’s spiritual awakening began eight years ago when she created the Amazon Activation Movement Method that was birthed through a process of rigorous personal development work and a lifetime of holistic living practices. Her journey of self -exploration through movement led her to understand how our limiting beliefs and stagnant energy in the body can cause imbalance.

And she discovered the dormant potential that can be activated upon learning to live from a place of deeper alignment. Through her dedicated practice to the Amazon Activation Method that she created, she experienced a deep cellular level restructuring that brought her spiritual awakening online. And today we are going to be learning more about that experience.

And Fruzsina, welcome to the podcast. We’re really excited to have you here and really looking forward to hearing more about this experience and your journey.

Fruzsina (01:29)

Thank you. I’m so, so excited to be here.I thought I’d be a little more nervous because this is kind of the first time I’ve really spoken about this activation or the awakening experience in and of itself. So it kind of makes it more real, you know, and that you’re sharing a story and it’s not just something that, you know, you keep to yourself and your inner circle, of what it all means to have an awakening of sorts and then to have all of these gifts come online that you’re not really, I don’t want to say prepared for, but it just kind of blows your mind a little bit of the vastness of and the miraculous way of the universe, 

So yeah, it’s very, very exciting to be here and to talk about this. So, thank you.

Kate (02:18)

Yeah, you’re welcome. So just to give a little context to how Fruzsina and I’ve met, we met in Hungary and we actually held our very first retreat together. And that was back in, I wrote it down, 2016. So yeah, so we’ve nearly 10 years. 

Fruzsina (02:34)

Wow. Been a couple years, yeah.

Kate (02:44)

And it’s been so amazing for me to watch most recently actually Fruzsina, make a switch to what I could tell was a very different way of talking and speaking and referring to experiences in her life. And as you said, you know, this miraculous way that awakenings kind of open a door for us to completely different world when gifts and things like that come online. And so really looking forward to diving into that.

So perhaps you could begin by sharing with us, you know, as I’ve known you back since 2016, you know, life was a little different then not, not too much, but a little different. Can you just give us some sort of background of what was life like before your awakening and what were sort of the events that led up to this particular experience?

Fruzsina (03:17)

So yes. Yeah.Sure. So yeah, I mean, back when we met, we just moved back from the States with my husband and my kids. And I just had kind of started to come into my own with teaching Barre, which is a ballet inspired movement method. Really, it’s kind of like standing Pilates, but includes elements of ballet and so forth. And I really found, you know, like satisfaction and just a lot of joy in that. So I felt like I was, that was it. I co -founded a studio and it was a really, really exciting time. I was getting a lot of press because I was the first one to bring Barre into Hungary. So I kind of found that I was in my, you know, I was right where I needed to be like completely aligned. But now in hindsight, like I was just starting to get aligned.

You know, I was already in my healing process when I became a Barre teacher and Barre instructor because a little, you know, unbeknownst to me, the music that I was putting together, the music tracks and the playlists that I was putting together for my classes were all from my childhood. Like these were playlists from my childhood and I began through Barre moving all of the you know, these heavy, painful, traumatic experiences, but in a very joyful way. I had no idea that this was happening. This is when I like put it all together later on. I was like, whoa, I was already doing it, but in a very, you know, just natural way without even having any intention or anything behind that. And then, you know, as the process progressed, I cleansed and cleared and purged my body, my physical body enough where a lot of other things were able to come online. And at that point when we met I was just in this joyful space of being really happy, having a big clientele, and just feeling successful in that. And that was a great place to be after being a stay -at -home mom for eight years and not really having much direction. I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up, quote unquote, you know? And it just felt really nice to finally feel like myself again. 

And then something shifted. I started to get burned out. I was teaching 20-25 classes a week. I was moving and teaching all of them at the same. It’s like, you’re not just instructing. I was putting my body through the wringer and I was exhausted. I was losing a lot of energy. And then slowly but surely, I also started to recognize that the space that I was in was toxic. It wasn’t right for me anymore.

Things that I hadn’t seen before started to be seen of the energetics and dynamics of relationships that weren’t really serving me anymore. And that was a really hard time and really, really challenging time for me. 

And I started to feel, you know, suffocated. And that’s when I started to really deep dive into my personal, you know, my personal past of trauma and heavy feelings and everything that kind of had begun to bubble up to the surface. You know, I started to dissect, you know, who I was, where all of these patterns and behavioral patterns and all of this stuff was and where it all came from. And I started to really heal that. And the Amazon activation came out of that. I needed to move my body in a very different way. I felt like my skin was tight, everything was tight. I had to like break free. 

Everything was confining. I felt like I had these chains on my body and I just felt like I needed to be liberated from something, which I didn’t know what it was. And for a year I was moving my body in a way I needed some kind of really deep release. And finally, after a year of trial and error, like, I was like, oh wow, this is it. This is what I wanted to feel in my body when I moved. You know, and also being a mom, I didn’t have a lot of free time, so it had to be in 70 minutes, right? So it’s like, condense it all. I wanted to be free, liberated, and you know, feeling like my authentic self, but I needed 70 minutes to do that. So, you know, it was a little bit of a challenge, but I felt like, you know, it whatever I was able to create, it was good.

And so I needed another year to learn how to teach what I had created because I don’t teach in a standardized way. It’s all channeled, but I didn’t know that I was channeling at the time because the way that I curate my music, it’s very specific to how we move the body and it’s, you know, we activate very specific codes. We open up the body to really bring our clairty and even clairvoyance online, you know? And I had none of this, you know, eight years ago, I wasn’t aware of any of this really. I was just doing it for me because these are the things that I was feeling and things that I needed to experience. And then as it turns out that other people were feeling that way too. And finally, you know, it’s been a long time coming because Hungary isn’t as open, I think, open -minded as a lot of other places in the world. So it’s like, I always have found that I’m always early to the party and then other people have to, I kind of have to wait around for people to show up. But this is the first time that I’ve actually waited around for people to show up because I know that this is a part of my purpose in my calling. So people are finally starting to show

So that was the physical part, cleansing, clearing, purging, removing, detoxing, heavy, heavy layers upon layers upon layers of stagnant blocked energy of old feelings, thoughts, projections, societal programming, generational programming, I mean all of it. And then I think I cleansed and cleared enough that the universe was like, all right, you’re ready, girl. And I was like, oh, sure, okay, deep meditation. And then one day it’s like, oh no, this is something very different and something else activated. And I was, I think I was prepared, but still not, you know, because you don’t expect, at least I never expected anything like this to happen to me. I was like, oh yeah, I believed and I knew about energetics and people having abilities. I never thought I would be one of those people. So that was, you know, I needed a moment to kind of process that, oh, okay, so this is who I really am.

Kate (10:26)

I want to ask you about the experience of first and foremost, before we get into this next part, when you’re working with your body prior to this and you’re saying that, you know, you were really working with shifting all of that old beliefs and programming for you, did that feel like you were carrying that in your body? Is that something that you felt energetically you were carrying? Yeah.

Fruzsina (10:45)

Oh, yeah. Absolutely.

Kate (10:50)

How did you know? How did you know that?

Fruzsina (10:52)

You know, I didn’t know. And I think that’s the thing. And I think that’s why I do what I do because I think that when we first start on these journeys, we really don’t know. I think we just kind of feel something and we have to be brave enough to take a chance on that feeling. But I think that’s why those of us who have gone ahead and we are the leaders, quote, like so to say.

We’re the ones who have to go ahead so that we can then help the other people who are now on their journeys of awakening and wherever that is because, I mean, this has been a lifetime for me, really. So the past eight years, the intensity and the rigorous activations and the several, several painful ego deaths that I’ve gone through, and that’s hard. You know, and that’s been my lifetime. I need an entire lifetime to be strong enough to hold that. But I know now that since I’m able to do it, it’s my job to help other people through theirs.

So I think I wasn’t fully aware of what I was holding onto in my body. And I wasn’t aware at all of the depth of heaviness that I was holding onto. But somehow along the way, it all started to come together and make sense. But it definitely, it was showing up in ways of, I knew I was on the right path when I was able to like deeply sweat and like detox my body because then I was able to have thoughts that then had a place to land. So as I was cleansing and clearing my body, even though it wasn’t in full awareness, other things were then able to come into those spaces that hadn’t been open or available or receptive prior.

Fruzsina (13:01)

So I think that’s how I knew. And now that I know that, these are things that I can help my clients with because I know exactly where they are on their journey and in their process.

Amanda (13:15)

I think this is really the first time in our conversation so far where the concept, I mean, maybe we’ve touched upon it, but the idea of really working with the body as a vehicle to shift, to awaken, like how important that is to take care of the vessel in order, for these changes to occur. And it sounds like you were naturally, like naturally guided there, right? Like your path led you to that. And I just as you were talking, the concept of joy and movement and music, right? Those are such powerful tools that we can use to shift, to move through things. And it sounds like you naturally did that through your work. And it was almost like you were like a perfect person to receive what you received with your teachings. And I’m really excited for us to dive in more about what that looks like, what the Amazon movement looks like. 

 

Kate (14:18)

I want to say, I agree. I think we’re really starting to open an important part of the conversation. I think so much of what you’ve also shared so far, sometimes when we have, and I know for a lot of people, when they have had quite a lot of trauma in their lives, they leave their body. And so this can be movement is a way to move energy without necessarily having to maybe dive into the stories or even the traumas.

But a way for us to begin to move the energy. And as you said, even in that detox process, create spaces for us to hear something different, to hear something new, to then, you know, come in to help us continue this process of moving energy, whatever that is, emotional energy. Cause I know for, you know, myself, even in yoga, when I became a yoga teacher, one particular pose that we opened the hips and I burst into tears.

And, you know, I literally saw like a muddy energy rise up in front of my eyes and then I couldn’t stop crying. And, and it was the first felt since I ever had of yes, we store energy in the physical body and then we can move it. And then there’s an emotional release. So, you know, really powerful conversation to start with, you know, start bringing in here. So yeah, Fru, do you want to continue from, from where you were like what unfolded for you then when you started to really start to continue this detox process for yourself, feel these new thoughts coming in. Is this really what led to the, you know, birthing of the Amazon method? 

And you know, what was the next part of the awakening for you that really unfolded?

 

Fruzsina (15:46)

Yeah, just to touch on what you were saying, you know, for many people, the body is not a safe place, because we’re not really taught to regulate our emotions, you know, stress, trauma, all of our experiences, whether they’re like, you know, everyone talks about trauma these days, and it’s very easy to misinterpret what it means because yes, everyone carries their own, their own bit of whatever that means to them, their own heaviness, but there absolutely are differences in scale and so forth, but we should never compare ourselves because we have, our experiences are heavy in their own right. We’re dealing with transgenerational energetic imprints that we don’t have to go very far for to experience deep, deep loss in our generational line with our ancestors and that’s imprinted in our bodies, okay, all of us. It’s in our cells and we have cell memory. 

And now obviously my experiencing and my abilities to decode and receive energetics has become very, very complex. We do very deep karmic release. But this isn’t obviously where I started. It started with my own physical and needing to create a felt sense in my own body of being the Amazon of my life. So and that’s how you create new patterns and belief systems. You have to have a felt experience body in order for your subconscious mind to really believe that unbeknownst to me, that’s what I was doing. I had no idea how I was feeling and how I was really living at that time. I’ve since gotten a divorce. I’m on my own with my two kids. Obviously, my ex -husband, their dad is a part of their life. So it wasn’t like a nasty breakup, but it was something that was necessary. Like everything in my life had to go.

It’s like I had to shed layers and layers of my own skin, but I had to be strong enough to hold that. And that’s where the Amazon coding comes in. It’s being courageous and it’s being brave and it’s being able to hold your authenticity, really. And it’s a layer by layer removal of everything that you are not to then be able to be who you are.

Right, and you know then when the ultimate activation came on for me, when I received the crystalline energy, and it was this merging of a former life as a high priestess, an Egyptian from ancient Egyptian times, and merging into who I am now, it was a deep karmic fulfillment of something that at that time was able to manifest for reasons unbeknownst to me, but for some reason in that lifetime, it wasn’t safe, the timing wasn’t right, we were keepers of sacred knowledge and somehow that time, that world, the people in that and that particular portal of time, it just wasn’t able to, you know, it just wasn’t able to happen, you know, all everything that we were working for at that time, it just wasn’t able to, we weren’t able to finish what it is that, you know, we were there to do at that time. But we’re here to do that now. 

And so I needed to clear out and cleanse out everything from my body in this lifetime to be able to at least match and meet where I was at that time. And then of course, you know, it’s been a continual growth and deepening and expansion ever since. So this has been about four years now since that awakening, that I would say that true awakening. Because up until that point, I feel like I was cleansing, clearing, purging, and being prepared for the awakening.

 

Amanda (20:12)

Can you speak to from your insight, from your experience, what you’ve been through and like what you know about, you know, your previous, that previous lifetime specifically, like what, from your perspective, like what is the time that we’re in right now? I’d love to hear, like we have our ideas, but I’d love to hear your perspective and your thoughts and just from your experience.

Fruzsina (20:22)

Well, I think we’re in a very interesting right now. I feel like I always bring up that picture in my mind from The Matrix when Neo is in that room and there’s the TV, he’s surrounded by the TVs and he looks around and it’s like, oh, you’ve been here before. And it’s like, they show that he’s literally been there like several hundred thousands, whatever amount of time. And now he’s fine, like everything else is finally fully aligned. And I think that’s where we are right now. I feel like the re, whatever reasons for the new world I think that we’re creating and those of us who know what that new world is, even though I don’t know exactly what it is, but I feel it and I hold the intention of that in my mind and when I’m together with people who have the capacity to hold that, it’s amazing because I think that’s how we’re creating it. 

Because it isn’t in everybody’s minds yet. So we’re still the minority, but I think that the more of us come on board, I think the stronger the new world and whatever that means exactly, I think the stronger it gets in its building and the foundation is gaining momentum. So I think it’s a very pivotal time.

And I think we are actually, despite what the world wants us to believe, I think we are exactly where we need to be and we are absolutely in the right place. And I think everybody who is a keeper of the sacred information, is in their place and we’re getting stronger every day and we’re able to hold our sacred duties, you know? And I think that’s what it is. We’re committed to our soul purposes and that’s who I am. I am a loyal servant of God. That is who I am. And that’s who I became. So it’s not even me, Fruzsina, is important anymore. That is what I live my life by.And that comes first. And that’s been very, very hard because you have to remove any attachments, anything that you still cling to, anything that you…

You know, it’s even just my children, what they mean to me has had to change because I’ve had to learn to let them go. And because I’ve had to recognize that, you know, I can’t put that kind of pressure on them, that they have to mean certain things to me. So I have had to set them free from any obligations. You know, so that becomes very nuanced and very, very painful. And every time you have to be willing to sacrifice and die a little bit for that. But that’s what you do when that’s your job. And I think that’s ultimately where I’ve found myself.

Kate (24:03)

And in what I’m hearing you say, there is a couple of things. It’s both a healing journey, but also these ego deaths that you spoke to. And in my journey, when we recorded that, that was, has been, was my experience as well. It was an ego death. And it’s one of the most painful things to experience when we have to confront a part of ourselves that needs to die in some ways.

Can you speak a little bit about that for us, for us from your experience of an ego death and, and how you’ve been able to work through that, you know, to get yourself to this place of the strength obviously has come through the movement, as you said, becoming this Amazon woman to hold these experiences, but prior to really embodying that fully, they are these ego deaths. There are these things we have to heal. Can you speak a little bit more to, you know, those ego death experiences you had and how you sort of turned up to those moments of you know, coming to those realizations of I have to let these things go. And, you know, just what that was like for you?

Fruzsina (25:08)

I think it was, you know, being forced to surrender and to just really, I know it’s like cliche to say, just let it go because it’s not easy to let it go. But just to recognize… I think letting go is more of a state than an actual thing that you have to do. At least that’s where I think that’s how I can make sense of it now.

Ego deaths for me, I don’t know about you guys, but this past fall was, woo, 2023 from August to December was like one ego death. It was probably just a massive, shift of God being like, okay, this is what you signed on for. You’re really ready? Really, really, really? And yeah, I am. I can say that I am because am now trustworthy, fully trustworthy. I can be entrusted with the sacredness of what I’ve been given because I know that I won’t abandon myself, I won’t reject myself, I won’t betray myself any longer because I just can’t do that and I don’t work that way anymore because I’ve had to release, you know, done so much release and purging and there’s always going to be something a next layer. So obviously I’m not an enlightened being and I have my faults and I screw up every day and what have you. But I’m trustworthy. I’m able to like hold what has been and what is being bestowed onto me. And these ego deaths, had to have me face all of these. It was very much a combination of owning my truth, but also outing so many layers of my shadow. I mean, it was probably the most excruciating shadow experience and paying off all of the remnants of karmic debt of lifetimes in the past when I was not on the good side. You know, that’s, I think people, what we forget is that it’s, you know, it’s very easy to be in the victim’s story of like, oh, life, they hurt me or this person or that person, but that’s not the way karma works. We’ve also been on the other side where we cause the pain. We are the ones who lie and cheat and betray and manipulate and take advantage.

And facing those parts, I think that’s very hard. And most people don’t really wanna face those parts, but you kinda can’t get around that. At least not in this stage of the awakening process, I think. It’s like, it’s a non -sensual. Yeah.

Amanda (28:12)

It’s really uncomfortable.

Fruzsina (28:14)

And that’s how I know exactly who I am by knowing that, yeah, that’s how I can be of service because I know that I’ve been on the other side. I have no more, I don’t have these false illusions of what being, I don’t want to be a good person, you know? that whole like idea of what a good person is. I don’t think there is such a thing, you know, you it’s about being true and making the right choice.

So yeah, I feel the ego death, to sum it up, I’m trying to make, this is the first time I’ve spoken about it, it’s kind of hard to try and reflect and talk about it at the same time. To give myself the freedom to be who I am by giving everybody the permission to see as they need to see me.

So I’m no longer in any kind of attachment to needing to be a certain way for anybody. Everybody’s free to be who they are. And that’s how I’ve been able to liberate myself. So I think that’s the shadow work of being a good mom, being a good friend, being like all of these things and then facing, oh, well, hey, remember that lifetime. I did that so it’s like all balancing out and and equaling out to being like okay I’m just here and I’m just in service and then. That’s it.

Amanda (29:58)

Yeah, the word that was coming through as you’re speaking was judgment, right? Like, so when we’re trying to be good, we’re constantly judging ourselves. We’re judging others. We believe other people are judging us. Like there’s just this like circle of judgment happening. And then when we release that need to like be something for someone else, like we also release that judgment. And therefore we don’t, once we’re no longer judging ourselves, we are no longer judging others. And like you said, others we’re free to be us and others are free to be them. And then it’s like this whole liberation process that happens as a result of releasing that need, that judgment that we carry, right? Like I feel is a, it’s ancestral, right? It’s deep within our like DNA and it’s like getting to know that judgment and like learning how, like through all the methods that you’ve spoken about and that you’ve been through, it’s like learning how to release that.

Once we learn to recognize that it’s there, right? We have to be able to see it and then we can then let it go. I wanted to touch back on what you talked about your vision, right? You have this vision and yesterday in a conversation with a mentor of mine for something that I was, that in my personal life that came she talked about holding the vision for what I want to, for what’s possible, for the potential. And like, that’s what I heard you say when you talked about the vision of like this new earth of where we’re potentially going.

I feel like, you know, as you’re talking, like it activated me and I feel like you may be speaking, like what is your vision if you feel able or comfortable? ebcause I feel like that could be activating for others as well. 

Fruzsina (xx:xx)

So a couple things. Two things have been very much in the forefront. One has been the masculine.The masculine is hurting. The men are not well in the world. Very unwell, very sick. And that is also like for men, but it’s also the masculine within ourselves. So whenever I get information about, youn know, where the world is, I always come back to me because you know, that’s what I have control over and then with my clients, I try to bring it into our sessions, but I don’t have to bring it in because it’s there. It always ends up being like the topic in the forefront. The masculine is hurting. The women aren’t well either, the men need a lot of support right

And I think the more that we can heal our inner masculine. I think that’s how we can be of service to the world at this moment because I think the men are very much, I mean, yes, toxic masculinity, but I think what it is with the masculine energy and the essence of the man is that everyone is in the wrong place. Like they’re not using the energy of what they’re here to do and who they’re here to be. And that’s why everyone’s actually sick and unwell. So there has to be a shift for the man as we know him, but it’s going to require a lot of humility and a lot of humbling down, coming down, down, and a lot of surrender. And I know that it’s going to happen. It’s interesting because whenever I have kind of a vision or a feeling, three new men clients have come.

And so the men are coming, like they’re asking for help because they, and within their communities, the men who are able to heal, then they’ll be able to help their communities, respective communities. And also, interestingly enough, a lot of my girlfriends, my friends for some reason, many of them are much younger, one is pregnant and she’s pregnant with a boy. And so it’s like the new era of masculinity is coming online. And I think that is something that’s a major shift in the world. Like the masculine has to be in his right place because he’s not in his right place at the moment. So that’s been something that I have been working with that’s been unfolding and coming online.

And very recently. Yeah. Yeah.

Amanda (xx:xx)

I was going to say really quickly, sorry, that is exactly what that conversation was about. So that’s perfect. Yeah.

Fruzsina (xx:xx)

Oh, that’s so awesome! See, I love that, because, you know, I’m not the only one getting this information. And that’s what I love about it. Because there you are in Mexico, right? And in your community, you’re getting the same information.

Amanda (xx:xx)

Yeah.And the person I was speaking to was in Europe and, you know, yeah.

Fruzsina (xx:xx)

Oh cool, okay. Yeah, and that’s why our jobs are so sacred because getting the man, the masculine, to his rightful place is really sacred work, as is getting the woman to her rightful sacred place is also really sacred work. And it’s not for the faint of heart. It’s not for the fragile ego. And it’s for people who can lead people to those places without controlling, without domineering, without using those toxic traits. Because being a healer, being a guide, being whatever you want to call that work that we do, you have to be able to put yourself in the back because it’s not about me. It’s like I’m the conduit for something, but it’s never me. It’s something that, you know, it’s just, yeah, it’s never me.

Kate (xx:xx)

And that’s you really turning up to be in service, right?

Fruzsina (xx:xx)

So, yeah, yeah, it’s never about me. And that’s another thing, that’s another ego death, right? Of letting go of the attachment to, oh, wow, how amazing that I channeled that information through. It’s not me, you know? And really knowing. Because the ego does like to flare up every once in a while, they do you know, it’s a work to keep your ego in check. Because some of these old things, yeah, these old things…

Amanda (xx:xx)

Good check and balance. You can balance this sound like, you know, you deviate too much. You’re going to get smacked down a little bit to back to humility. Yeah.

Fruzsina (13:05)

Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah, so the man needs help. That’s not saying that the woman doesn’t, but the man is very, very much in pain at the moment. And then what another interesting thought or vision that has come through very recently, just a few days ago, is a return to innocence. Where people have been all over the world, the innocent have been taken advantage of and retribution is coming for that. That is no longer allowed or permitted. And that’s a heavy, heavy topic, I think. One that is just unfolding, in integrity of like knowing who you are because I think all of us, you know, can be or maybe have been prone to temptation and where you know you can get away with something or yeah, you know, you can take advantage of a person but like, will you? Even if you know you can.

So yes, that is a very new theme of keepers of innocence. And I think that’s also what I do. I allow people to stay innocent in and exploring their truth and becoming aligned to who they are, and they’re allowed to be safe with me. That’s all the work. I think that’s all the shadow work.

Amanda (xx:xx)

That’s hard work, right? As far as like, as you’re talking, it’s like, I think like on a collective level, like, and as you’re speaking about it, I think that’s going to be a hard one for people to like that, that can create an awakening, right? Like beginning to see those darknesses that are very present. They’ve existed through generations and certain industries, like certain ways of the world working, right, has been built on exploitation of innocence as people, you know, as more is coming to light and as more is coming to light, that’s going to be, people are going to have to like go within and see where is that within them? Like where did it happen to them? Or, you know, like those shadows are going to come out of us on an individual level, right? That’s why we’re I feel like we’re seeing it as well, but yeah, that’s hard work, like to hold that space, right, to allow it to be seen and to be experienced so then we can move beyond it, right? Because that’s eventually where we want to go. 

Fruzsina (40:02)

Yeah. Absolutely. And that’s, I think that’s, yeah, I’m really proud of that, that I’ve been able to go so deep within myself to like really just get naked and raw and have it not matter, you know, and not be ashamed of any of that because, you know, so much of all the work that I’ve done is, you know, I’ve had to deal with so much like shame. And then also this part of owning who I am comes with shame. Like, how do you tell people? I mean, I don’t know about you guys, but how like, I’m like just starting to feel comfortable talking about who I am, you know, like, how do you tell people, oh yeah, like, and then they’re gonna say what, like, I don’t know. There comes a lot of shame with that, at least for me. I mean, I’ve never felt particularly smart. I wasn’t the person with the best grades ever.

And then now coming forward with something that you can’t hold a PhD up for. And then here you are, like how do you have the audacity to think you know things, you know? That’s hard.

Kate (41:22)

I think you’re speaking like a really powerful, you know, truth that’s part of the awakening journey is that, you know, we have these lives that we live and we’ve talked about this before somewhat on autopilot, potentially following paths that have been guided by others, suggested by others, that we may want to please other people. And I know people pleasing was a massive part of my journey. And, you know, you lose yourself in that and there’s only so far you can go. And, and then, you know, the rubber band snaps and you’ve got to come back.

Yeah, I think the, the hardest, one of the hardest parts is when we realize who we have been being. And that was my experience, or what we have to let go of. And then when, when that’s gone, what’s left and you’re like, Oh, I’ve got to be this person in the world. All right. No, it’s not really like that, but I mean, there’s such a beauty to finding and feeling the truth of who you are. And it’s such a, I don’t know what the word is, but it’s like the, the, such a challenge is like, if you’re so good to be me and yet the world I live in, when I speak these things and want to speak my truths, they’re judged, they’re shamed, they’re called woo woo, they’re called crazy. There’s no science for that. And it’s like, but this is truth and real, and it’s more real than anything I’ve ever experienced in my entire life. And, you know, I think this is the, one of the greatest challenges that we’re going to face as we all do awaken is that we have to be so committed to the actualization of this thing that wants to come through us. I always feel it is like the energy’s rising, you know, it wants to come up out through us and be, you know, poured out into the world. And, you know, we’re, it’s great to find community and we’re hoping through our conversations that people can see that, you know, these challenges are real. We go through them, but it does take courage and it does take some of us to go first to own it, create a podcast and talk about it. You know, you to come on and share your story. And I know Hungary, the minds aren’t all that, you know, open.

So, you know, kudos to you to lead and go first because someone has to, right? And it is our obligation to do that, to show, you know what, let’s just stand here and be the real us, you know, because the feeling and felt experience of it trumps anyone else’s opinion of me. And yes, it’s a journey and yes, it’s work. And, you know, it’s facing that fear. It’s facing those edges. It’s those big ego deaths and then those micro ones every time you sort of show up again and again and again. And I’ll say from my experience and then perhaps both of you could share as well that the more that I show up for that, and especially I think a big growth for me has been creating this podcast, having these conversations, knowing that they’re going out there and that my dad will probably listen to them at some point.

But it feels like it’s just truly helping me embody this version of me by like actually giving it a voice. So, you know, it’s, it’s powerful to start to speak it and share it, you know, first and foremost in the safe circles with the people who get it, but then gradually more and more knowing that it’s totally okay that people don’t get you and just that it’s, this is my journey. This is my path. This is what’s real for me. And that’s really all that matters. And I sort of heard you say some of that too, Fru, you know, Amanda and Fru, like, how do you, what do you think about that? How, how, you know, what’s your experience of that?

Fruzsina (45:05)

Well, I’m just gonna say it now, but like when I had the awakening and I had the crystalline activation in my hands, I felt these crystals in my hands, in the palms of my hands. And then as my third eye, my crown, simultaneously was brought on line. This was June 12th, 2020. 10 o ‘clock. We lived in a different town, but the 10 o ‘clock church bell was ringing. And it was, I was like, I could hear it, but I was somewhere totally different. And I had this crystalline activation and I got very specific instructions on how to keep my body and mind, and, you know, cleansed and cleared for the time being and then I just got all this like information that I don’t even remember because it was so fast. This like massive download of information.

So I feel like it just kind of flooded in and I went through this initiation process, in my physical and then also I knew that in this multi -dimensional space I was also somewhere else getting initiated and prepared and so forth. So some of that, well now the world’s gonna know it, aren’t they? So there you go, outing that shadow, right? Setting myself free. And then people are gonna be like, whatever. Yeah, I think you just have to, just have to own it. Whatever stage you’re at, is where you’re at. You just have to be that in that space and in that time. And just know that  it’s a forever evolvement.

So I’m now reluctant to say things of like, oh, I’ll never do this. There’s a couple things I know that I’ll never. And I just to touch back on that of like, I know I’m trustworthy now, which means the responsibility that I have to being trustworthy is that I won’t self abandon and betray and reject. And that also comes with a lot of hardships because sometimes you have to release people who don’t align.

And you have to be willing to shed all of these layers. Getting a divorce wasn’t easy because then, but I can’t be attached to, I can’t be bound to the guilt of like, oh, my children. No, my children, if I’m looking at it from the highest perspective, they know who they are. They know who they were born to. They know who their mother is, they know who their father is, and they will be fine. Like, I can’t be bound by guilt, fear, and shame. So that’s what I’m really responsible for, and that’s what being truthful is to me, you know?

And yeah, and I think that’s why we go first, because someone has to, like you said, Kate. Someone has to go first. And I didn’t think I’d be the one to put my hand up. And I’m sure we’re not the first ones, because I pay deep homage to people who have done her work in times when the energy was heavy and dense. And I mean, there was really no movement for a long, long time, but some people still chose, you know, paths of being way showers and then they held the light, you know, when it just seemed hopeless. But it’s not hopeless now.

Kate (xx:xx)

Amanda, what would you like to share on that?

Amanda (48:54)

Yeah, so this just came up yesterday in conversation. How in the past year, I realized that I had this need to be understood and how that need to be understood was preventing from actually being me.

I recognize that I was trying to be understood by my dad and I realized that like, he just like who I am is kind of out there and he it’s okay that he doesn’t understand me. And so like stepping into this like acceptance that like I can love him and he can love me without him fully understanding me and I don’t have to morph into something that I’m not in order to receive that understanding or acceptance that I can be accepted as I am or not and that was really empowering. And then also, we were talking about before we got on the call, how we’re all three in, three different locations around the world, Kate Japan, Fruzsina in Hungary, and I’m in Mexico. And we landed here almost just over a year ago here in central Mexico. And it was sort of it felt very random at the time, but coming here had this very potent power. And looking back, I see that where we are is a place of strong creation. Most people coming here, they’re artists, they’re creators of some way, they are creating their lives. And what I have recognized is that elsewhere I’ve always felt like I’ve needed to hide this part of me that wants to create things, it has ideas. And so I’ve always kind of kept things contained or hidden because I didn’t want to seem too weird or out there beingable to just like speak the things that I’m doing or creating and not people look at me like I’m, you know, have a second head, right? Like has been so liberating to just be like, no, like people are, this is like, this is normal to have these ideas. And it’s just, you know, I just speak what I’m doing and people get it. And so on the one hand, like it’s been good to not feel, not need that understanding, but on the other hand, like being in an environment where it’s embraced has also been supportive for me pursuing paths, creating a podcast, like doing things out of my comfort zone, because I’ve, there’s been this, like the resistance that comes when like, there was like a resistance there of like, oh, people don’t understand me. It’s almost like a chip on my shoulder. And like, I’ve been able to like release that chip and like be free of that in a way.

Kate (51:54)

So, Fruzsina, this has been an amazing conversation. I’ve loved where this has gone and we’re coming up to time now. So what I’d really like to do is give you an opportunity to share with our listeners the incredible work that is the Amazon Activation Movement Method. If you want to tell us a little bit more about that and also the work that you’re doing in the world and how anyone that might be listening in Hungary or if you do online, I don’t know, maybe able to, okay, amazing work with you, learn more about what you do so that they could be, you know, having some really powerful experiences to clear their own energy and, you know, all of the stuff that we talked about.

Fruzsina (52:30)

Thank you. So things that I’m still doing, I’m teaching my weekly classes for those people who are here in Hungary. I do have a couple of workshops, not even workshops, but outdoor classes set up for the summer, which is sound healing, like sound baths along with my Amazon activation classes. That’s once a month in the summer.

And then I have my signature Becoming Amazon course online available on my website, theamazonactivation.com and that’s a five day foundational course. It’s movement, meditation, journaling to really set the foundation of cellular restructuring, to really start facing, you know, clearing out emotional debris so forth from the physical body.

But new things are coming online, which I am just now creating. So I think the best way to really access all of the new things that have come on board is to work with me one -on -one because all of the new stuff that is going to be available online, I think that’s going to really come together come September.

But I to open up my studio space for one -on -one retreats, like one -on -one deep dive work here in my studio space, which would be like a personal retreat for the weekend, or maybe even a couple weeks if someone would want to really go deep/ 

And then my studio space where I work would be converted into, it’s a livable space, the kitchen, bathroom, so forth. So those are things that I’m starting to now open my physical one -on -one stuff to, shift into because I think people really need that personal support.

So yeah, one -on session, energetic decoding, understanding the complex infrastructures of these deep, energetic, karmic connections that are in the finer layers of the energetic field that are affecting decision -making, that are affecting thoughts, and just really releasing all these binding patterns. So that’s what we do in these one -on -one sessions. So I think that would be a great way if someone would be interested to connect.

Kate (xx:xx)

Incredible. And so we’ll link your Facebook, your Instagram and your website so that people can follow you and watch whatever it is that unfolds and get in touch if they feel like they would like to take part in something online, working with you one -on -one. I think I might even book something for myself. And, I’m just going to pencil this in and plant the seed that once I get to Costa Rica, you’ll come and facilitate something at one of my retreats. 

Amanda (xx:xx)

So thank you Fruzsina for sharing so openly. I’m grateful that our podcast was the opportunity for you to speak about this powerful experience that you’ve had. And I look forward to connecting with you on social media and continuing to follow what you’re doing. Because what you said really spoke to me and was actually activating. So thank you.

Fruzsina (xx:xx)

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you guys so much.

Kate (xx:xx)

Yeah, you’re welcome. Thank you, Fru, and thank you to everyone who listened. We look forward to having you join us on the next episode.