Nadine’s Awakening
Embracing The Divine Feminine
In this episode, we are joined by Nadine Reader who shares with us her path of awakening.
Nadine’s journey took her from living life in the masculine energy and hustle culture to deeply embracing the feminine and discovering what true self-love is.
In our conversation, Nadine shares with us the moment of crisis and self-reflection that led her to ask deeper questions about her life and she speaks to the importance of self-responsibility and taking ownership of one’s choices.
Finally, she emphasises the significance of embracing our individual journeys and finding our unique paths to self-discovery and encourages listeners to tap into their own magic and embrace their true essence.
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In this episode...
Takeaways
- Living in authenticity requires courage and the willingness to embrace the challenges that come with it.
- Moving through grief and embracing the feminine are important aspects of the awakening journey.
- The awakening journey brings gifts such as deeper self-love, connection with nature, and a sense of presence.
- Self-responsibility with self-compassion is key to embracing one’s true essence and living a fulfilling life.
The guest
Nadine Reader
Nadine Reader is a Los Angeles-based holistic women’s wellness coach whose journey into the realm of wellness began with a personal quest for self-discovery and a deep-seated passion for physical training. After 15 years of coaching she realized that the conventional approach to wellness, one size fits all, was not cutting it for her or her former clients’ unique journeys – a realization that sparked her mission to guide women on a path to discovering their own, individual essence.
Through a blend of personal training, nutrition consulting, life coaching, breath work, sound healing, creative practices, and nature experiences, Nadine champions a whole-person approach. She empowers her clients to tune into their heart’s Knowings, desires, and individual voices, embracing a life that resonates with their physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental aspirations.
At the core of Nadine’s philosophy is that we are already whole, healed and loved, it’s the great adventure of our lives to unlayer all that aid our collective “forgetting” of who we truly are. By fostering deep compassion and kindness towards oneself, she helps her clients explore and remember the multifaceted dimensions of their existence.
When not coaching or dreaming up her future nature based wellness haven, Nadine finds her highest joy and wonderment in nature. An avid photographer and traveler, she cherishes these moments of exploration and service alongside her husband, Ricardo, capturing the beauty of the world through her lens and sharing it with others.
Nadine’s journey is a testament to the power of personal transformation and the beauty of living a life aligned with one’s true self.
Resources
Transcript
Kate (00:00)
Welcome back to the Awakening Conversations podcast. My name is Kate. I’m here with my cohost Amanda. And today we have another guest joining us. Nadine Reader. Nadine is a dear friend of mine that I met when we both lived in Dubai. We are now living in different parts of the world. And it’s just incredible to me that our lives in some way, while completely different, have followed a similar path of awakening and I cannot wait to share Nadine’s story with you.
To let you know a bit more about Nadine, she is a Los Angeles based Holistic Women’s Wellness Coach whose journey into the realm of wellness began with a personal quest for self discovery and a deep -seated passion for physical training. After 15 years of coaching, she realized that the conventional approach to wellness, one size fits all, was not cutting it for her or her former clients unique journeys. This realization sparked her mission to guide women on a path of discovering their own individual essence. The core of Nadine’s philosophy is that we are already whole, healed and loved, and that it’s the great adventure of our lives to unlayer all that aid our collective forgetting of who we truly are.
And when she is not coaching or dreaming up her future nature -based wellness haven, Nadine finds her highest joy and wonderment in nature. An avid photographer and traveler, she cherishes these moments of exploration and service alongside her husband, Ricardo, capturing the beauty of the world through her lens and sharing it with others.
Nadine’s journey is a testament to the power of personal transformation and the beauty of living a life aligned with one’s true self. Nadine, welcome to The Awakening Conversations podcast. We’re so excited to have you join us today.
Nadine (01:52)
Thank you Kate, thank you Amanda, I appreciate it. I sound so fancy. I just always, I love that while I’m sitting barefoot, feet on the floor, I love that, just the beautiful balance of both, right? Balance of both nature and a little bit of fancy.
Kate (01:59)
You are, you are fancy. Yes. Claim that claim that.
Amanda (02:00)
You are.
Kate (02:12)
Nadine, you are here today on our podcast to begin to share with us more about your awakening journey. And so we’ve obviously had some conversations pre this to get a better understanding of what that actually was for you. And so to begin with our episode today, what I would love for you to do is share with us this experience for you, because I know that it was a time in your life where you were very much in a hustle culture, masculine energy, but feeling like that and the life you were living was not really congruent with your true nature, you know, how you really wanted to live your life. And so at the same time, moments of pulling away from that hustle, which kind of led you to asking some deeper questions in life. And ultimately, you know, going on to answer those, which was your awakening experience. Can you paint that picture for our listeners of what life was like and what it was that really led, what was happening in your life, what you were doing that really led you to this awakening moment?
Nadine (03:29)
Wow, Kate. You placed that so beautifully and I just want to start with a deep breath, just grounding myself before the story unravels from my mouth. Wow. Growing up in the 80’s and 90’s, that’s where I am kids. We are in our 40’s here. For everyone listening. This is the older sister circle.
I think that definitely translated from a previous generation in when we say the masculine. I was basically bringing myself up like a boy. I always wanted to be a boy. And going back to that very first question, whose approval that I want to have, and that was my Dad’s. My Dad was mentally and physically disabled after an accident when I was a baby. And I always wanted a real Dad in my little girl voice. And I did everything, everything that a boy would do and do. I was really good at that as well.
So growing up from a quite a very turbulent, traumatic childhood, I always wanted to prove myself, always wanted to prove that I’m good enough to fit in with a cool crowd, but in an abstract way. And I always promised myself, I’m going to make it one day. I’m gonna make it one day.
That brought me to airline from Dubai. I moved from South Africa to Dubai and started being in the airline industry where everything also is run on the clock, regular, like very structured, very right brain dominant, which is needed, of course. And then from there, I channeled all my energy into the fitness and to the coaching industry where, it’s just so happened in the early 2010’s, I pioneered a whole new way into the wellness industry in Dubai, meaning bringing coaching, life coaching together with fitness and nutrition. And every one of my clients, Kate, you were one of those clients, which I’m so grateful for, we did a beautiful photo shoot at the end of that experience. And that was kind of a story to tell.
And whether it’s luck, whether it’s karma, whether it’s fate, that was an interesting story in media. And so my journey also got to be recognized in the media. The story is going somewhere. And so I lived a, you could say, I lived a high profile life in the media in Dubai. I was a seven time cover girl. It’s so hard for me to say these words because I don’t resonate with that anymore. But that’s the history. And I did everything I could, training clients at night.
Training clients during the day, at nighttime, red carpet events to keep up into the circles that I needed to be in. And then all of a sudden I get the validation, not only from my peers, but also from the outside world. And then social media started after that. I started working with the Royal Family with all the high tier families in Dubai. So, that was a lot even just saying that makes me feel dizzy. I would sleep four hours a night and start the next morning at five o’clock again just to just to continue.
I did this many years in a row not only just for validation seeking, at that time I was at my previous marriage where I was a bread winner as well so it was, I just needed to make the money to stay in Dubai, pay people salaries that was involved in my previous husband’s business. So there was a lot of pressure on me and I was like, I signed up for it, I’m gonna do this.
And we could say 2015, 2016, there were periods of time where I started, every time my previous husband would travel three months at a time, I started retracting completely from the world. I would be in bed for a week at a time and not answer my phone, not get to text. I just couldn’t move. I just couldn’t move and I just didn’t know what’s wrong with me. And I obviously did not even have the logic to go see someone. I was like, okay, I just need rest. I just need rest. But looking back at that now, my word, it was no wonder. I was just so good. Oh, this beautiful, beautiful young girl. Oh my word. I have so much compassion for her. So.
For years and years and years it went on like that and Kate and Amanda at 2016, you could say it was the peak of my career in Dubai. It just started cracking for me. It started cracking, the facade started cracking, the marriage that I was in, it was really hard for me to be a breadwinner and then also to not be completely connected to my partner and even myself. I didn’t know myself at all at that time. I was just running, running the wheels to be like, hey, I’m here. People look at me, see me, and I’m just enjoying it. I’m traveling all over the world at that time as well. Did a lot of social media events for hotels, five star hotels.
So yeah, a lot went on. And then I really wanted to escape my life. And the easiest way for me, and this is a big, big theme in my life, and I know for a lot of women as well, the courage to speak our truth. I did not have that, or I didn’t practice that. I had no idea how to even tap into that. And instead of just saying, hey, this is me, I’m exiting this phase of my life, I need to go and explore something else, I did the easy way else, out and I had an affair or had an extra marital affair with someone else just to be selfish and to be, you know, just not to know what I’m doing. And that just absolutely a disaster for myself, for myself and truly just taking full responsibility in that. I did share that with my previous husband and he was willing to work through it and I was, I can’t, I have to…I have to explore who I am. This is not who I am and this is not a life that I want to live. And I ended the marriage in early 2017. And beautiful, lovely, lovely partner. And I still, sometimes I have phases like, oh, I just still forgive myself for not knowing better or not doing better and meaning speaking, being courageous and speaking my truth and honoring a relationship that was really beautiful.
So then, I just disappeared. And I didn’t go anywhere. I was in Dubai, but I moved into this beautiful little villa sharing with other ladies and I stayed in my room for almost two months and just dying really, that ego death completely, just unlayering. It’s like, who am I and what am I doing here?
Nadine (11:03)
And I always tell the story of the runaway bride, the movie, The Runaway Bride, where Julia Roberts find herself in all these different relationships and she will always order the same eggs that her partner orders, like not knowing what she likes for her. And then there’s this scene where she’s creating all these different egg dishes to finally find out which egg dish she wants. And that I feel like that 2017 was that year for me. What, how do I like my eggs?
Who is Nadine? How do I connect with myself? And at the end of 2017, I was blessed with the gift to go to the Tony Robbins six days, Date With Destiny. And day four was a relationship day, feminine and masculine. This is my first time, at that time I was 37 years old. God bless social media. The kids these days have everything in front of them. That’s so wonderful to learn that in a post, but feminine and masculine principles. And that’s the first time I learned that I have kept my feminine side in a safe and threw the key away for my whole life. And I was running the masculine programming and I didn’t even know how to begin to see myself before I learned that there’s a feminine and masculine, and my cat is playing in a box there if there’s any noises from that side. And I just learned how just to be seen, the beautiful feminine principle of being seen and not by anyone else, but by myself.
And end of 2017, that’s where the deep journey of true self love, self compassion, self kindness. Can I be, can I sit, can I love myself in this moment? Whether I F up, whether I do good, whether I’m just average, without performance, can I just love myself? Can I appreciate myself? Can I just see myself in this, with this heart? Wow, that was a big, big, that was a big breakthrough for me, just understanding that. So, long story to come to that moment Kate and true true true true self recognition and compassion and then 2018, a few months in, like actually half of the year I met my my husband now which is the love of my life and it feels so wonderful to say that.
And he was deep on a yogic path, meaning more the philosophy, the eight limbs of yoga, which just cracks open so much. And I learned so much through that. And I’ve been an apprentice of our teacher for a very, very long time. And the principles of yoga, not the stretchy bendy, Alo yoga, Lululemon thingy, no the deep teachings of that which is really the underground of every deep mystery teaching out there and yeah just deeper and deeper I went after that so that is that was the beginning of that for me, Kate.
Amanda (14:32)
Thank you for sharing that. What came up for me was that, and I think you’ve shared a story that I think a lot of people have lived, are living. It’s like where we’re acting out the patterns that we learned, right? How to be as a child, right? And then not even aware that we are running these programs. And then we get to the point where we have like a crisis, right? Where we’re going, we’re spinning on our wheels and it’s like, we’re not even aware of like what we’re going to or why we’re doing it. And then it’s like almost, it’s hard. And it’s also a gift to like have this breakdown to where then we can start asking those questions that you asked yourself of like, who am I really?
And then, you know, allows you to be guided to somebody that like is on a similar path. And, you know, those answers are, have come to you, it’s just an example of how the difficult, the most, the moments that seem like the most difficult in our lives are actually the greatest gifts of like redirecting us to find who we are. And I think I feel like your story encapsulated that so well. I don’t really have a question, but I just wanted to point that out.
Nadine (15:52)
Oh, thanks, Amanda. It’s true. It’s often when I’m working with a client or a woman, I just love women hearts, when there is almost a catastrophic moment of crisis, in my heart, I’m like, good. I love you and I bless you and good. This is where it starts. This is it. This is where it starts. I mean. So I resonate with that a lot, you know. And of course I say that with so much compassion that I don’t want anyone to feel or to be harmed or to be hurt. And that is also where a lot of self discovery, self exploration starts in those moments.
Kate (16:35)
Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And I will say too that what I really heard you say, and as you’ve even shared your story in the even expressing of, you know, how your marriage did end and I hear in your voice that sincerity of taking that full responsibility for what I, what I did, how I’ve lived my life and can speak with it with such honesty because you own it.
And we’ve spoken about this before that a large part of these, I think, initial awakening experiences for us, a doorway out of it, or a part of the first learning is this deep self responsibility that, you know, we are the ones that create our lives. You know, we create these experiences through our unconsciousness at some point, and then the, you know, the opening of our awareness, and then it’s, it’s really the onus is on us in those moments to say, okay, I can now see how I have been thinking, believing, operating, existing. And the most empowering thing right now is that I can, can claim it and own it.
And, you know, I spoke to that in my awakening experience of having my ego shown to me in a way of like, for the first time, even seeing it. And I was like, I just thought that was me, but no, it’s actually in some ways a program I’ve been running, telling myself. This is how I should live. This is what’s happening. This is why life is like this. And yet when you see it, you’re like, Oh my gosh, I actually have a choice. I have a choice. Do I want to keep running this program or do I want to take full responsibility for how that program came to be installed in my way of believing and seeing my world?
And if I do, I have to be honest and I have to be truthful and I have to really come in and take a, an inventory at a level that’s kind of like, it stings, right? It stings quite deeply to, to take that responsibility. And, but at the same time, you know, as we’re talking about these, these moments of crisis, like it is when you finally can get your hands on the reins. Right? Like it’s such a, a moment of like, well, here’s your opportunity, right? In the depths of this experience, here it is, like put your hands on it and if you’re ready for it, let’s go. You know, you can steer this ship.
And so, what I would love to ask now is, you know, you have shared that when you started to have these bigger, bigger questions of your life, you know, who am I and what am I doing? And, you know, maybe you cooked yourself eight plates of eggs. I’m not sure, but I know that through Ricardo, you know, you found the, the yogic path, but really the, the depths of what yoga truly is. And, um, other, what else was it that really you began to, to look into, explore, use as tools for you to, you know, do that inner work, because there’s some big things to work through, right? It’s not an easy thing to, to realize we’ve made certain choices or, you know, life has gone a certain direction to then just switch tack.You know, it’s not just a on and off switch.
So what were the things that really helped you deepen into answering those questions, coming to that place of self forgiveness and self love, you know, when we’ve been living a life for a long time where, you know, it was out of alignment with who we truly are in some ways, you know.
Nadine (20:09)
Thanks, Kate. Thank you. I just want to acknowledge the beautiful reflection of what you just shared and that total ownership of the stories that we lived and we created, co -created and believed and validated. It’s absolutely so true. And it is truly looking in the mirror and like, dude. This is my creation. And also knowing that the soul, our soul within created these agreements, right? And it’s so beautiful, just as it is. It’s happening just as it should.
Thank you for that question. And what sparked my ear when you said that, and I’m grateful for you, is, and this is one of the takeaways we can talk about later, is, knowing that there’s not only one way. My upbringing South African, very conservative, very Christian,that program ran in me, there’s only one way. There’s only one recipe to make a chocolate cake. There’s only one way to the peak of the mountain. There’s only one way. If there’s any other way, it’s a false way, it’s wrong. So learning through Ricardo and what is his way, I had to learn to listen to my own heart, but also that of someone else’s journey. The journey that is this soul, my soul’s journey, this beautiful vessel’s journey is going to look completely different from anyone’s. It might be nuanced or it might be completely 360, but this whole path until, from 2017 until until today, is truly tuning in, tuning, fine tuning my ear into what my heart, my heart is just my my cozy way of saying my higher self, my inner guidance, soul, spirit is leading me to do so i just want to really emphasize that everyone’s journey is so special, so unique and it’s our responsibility to start hearing the voice of our own hearts or our own true selves.
Something that really attracted me was numerology. I think numerology for me personally,
there was a knowing, there was a remembering. It’s like, oh, yeah. And there was uplifting in a way. I always feel like when we get guidance, it’s always uplifting. It’s never like demoralizing or fear based. It’s always like, oh, oh, yeah, I got it. You know, it’s always that feeling of upliftment and it is possible. Yes, this is a remembering. So numerology for me was definitely a beautiful path to learn into and lean into.
I call her Auntie, Auntie Louise Hay. Her material is so beautiful. She sounds like a Grandmother and truly I’m so grateful for that grandmother voice to come through me as well for a generation that needs to be nurtured and comforted in this way that I’ve been comforted and nurtured in that. So that was another beautiful member of my tribe when I was so alone and lonely on this path.
And, and then just the big Grandmother of all was nature. I spent as much time in nature, connecting with nature. Allowing myself to be guided through and with and by nature in any way that means whatever that translation is for me or for anyone else. So, those were three of the other little methods or guidance systems in a way that supported me through this journey of awakening, especially in the beginning. Yeah.
Amanda (24:22)
I just want to say how what you shared at the beginning about your upbringing and there being just one way at the mountain. And then as you started talking about the tools and the teachings that you particularly gravitated towards, it just came to me how many different teachings, modalities, options we can choose or that we can resonate with that can support us and they can support us at different times.
And which is kind of in a way different than your original upbringing, right? Which is like, follow this teaching, follow this dogma. It’s like, you know, which, which tools resonate with you and you can work with them for a bit. And then maybe you can, maybe find one finds their way to a different teaching or tool. And, then also, also, as you talked about, Louise Hay, it’s like, how magical that her work, her teachings live on through so many people that she affected, she touched. And it’s like this quant, it’s like, it represents like this quantum impact that we all can have through not even in our awareness, just through being, through doing what we feel called to do, we can impact others, which ultimately changes the world that we’re living in, because that’s how it works through that network. I love that those are the tools that you resonated with. And as you were talking about numerology, I was like, I never have, I’ve not really delved into numerology, but it’s like, I like numbers. And so I kind of want to, after you saying that, I want to go explore it a little. So thanks for that little, little nudge there.
Nadine (26:13)
Thank you, thanks Amanda, I appreciate
Kate (26:16)
And I’ll say to that too, you know, speaking about Louise Hay, right? A woman living in her truth and, and let’s even go back her time, right? It’s, it’s a, she’s now passed. So her living into the peak of that is a time where these conversations aren’t as commonplace, like we’re becoming more and more common. This is what we’re talking about now. And yet she had the, the gusto, the courage to just share what is authentically true for her.
And so Nadine, I’ve, you’ve spoken to, you know, this, the truth of who we are and living as the true self. Now there’s gifts in that, you know, and we get to share that with the world and yet same time it’s challenging. Can you maybe speak to that for our guests? Because, you know, we, Amanda and I have said to that, you know, even creating this podcast for us is an edge of stepping into our authentic expression, to facilitate these kinds of conversations, to talk about consciousness, to talk about, you know, experiencing God and you know what I mean? Like many, many things that there is still, still, and probably more so in Louise Hay’s day, but you know, it’s getting less and less for us now. However, she led the way, creating the space for us to, you know, step into our truths as well, because it’s in alignment, you know, when we speak a similar language, but you know.
As you have traveled along this growth path and learning to really love yourself, what have been some of the challenges for you of really stepping into, what did you come up against and maybe how did you work through them, but really speaking to the challenge of that authenticity, you know.
Nadine (27:53)
That’s a very, very good question. And that’s a very important, I think we talk and look at the healing path and awakening path, it’s like, yes, like high vibes. And it is, it is. That’s the practice. And we forget that it is. It’s definitely challenging, especially when it comes to our ego, our past remembering of who we thought we were. So challenges for me was talking about authenticity, talking about authenticity. Oh my word. Thank you.Second language English speaker here.
The moment where you feel like, what the fuck do I do now? What do I do now? Like in terms of a career wise for me personally, I was like, I feel so out of alignment with that. This is not what I want to do or be anymore. What do I do? What do I do now? There was moments I just wanted to go to Bali or to the Mediterranean, become a waitress in a little coffee shop and just do that and completely disappear.
That was the biggest challenge for me really. And then moving to Los Angeles as well, that was a whole new birth canal that I went through transitioning. What do I do now? It’s really that, that was really challenging for me. Because sometimes we are, on a career path that feels completely different or out of alignment to our new consciousness or our new awareness, our new witnessing of ourselves that was like a really starting over completely. So that was a very big challenge for me.
And then another challenge that I accepted for myself was really moving through grief. Grieving of the old. I often tell my friends here in Los Angeles, like when I walk in, when I walked into a gym or anywhere really in Dubai, like people were like, Hey, that’s Glory Girl. That’s my previous business name. That’s Nadine. Hi. It was so easy to connect through the knowing of who I was and walking in somewhere here. I’m like, and it’s like, oh yeah, I’m nobody. Oh yeah, I’m nobody.
And loving myself as that. And you know, and it might sound very strange to hear that, but it’s so important. It’s just so important for me to go through an ego death, on ego death, on ego death, completely clean, naked, new, new little baby into the world. And hard as well. It was definitely a big grieving of that.
For me personally, what I also allowed in this life. Amanda, in my former existence, I had six pack abs and I was very toned and very like, you know, shoot and photo shoot ready around every corner. I gained a lot of weight. I call it my I just went into softness. I completely went into the feminine. I let the masculine just so far behind. I did the opposite. I just embraced the softness and I became so gorgeous and curvy over the last few years. And truly grounded myself in love in that as well. And for my former career consciousness, that’s the hardest thing to do because that’s who you are. You are as good as what you look.
So that was, that was a challenge for the ego and such a deepening for my heart and the feminine. And it’s really the last three months that I’ve started to come into balance. It’s like, okay, I’m ready for balance. I’m ready for just embracing loving on the masculine, loving on the feminine, bringing them together and let’s be aligned, completely aligned now. So it’s been a journey for me, my goodness. So Kate, I’m sure there’s a few other things, but the biggest challenges was definitely what do I do now in my career? And then grief, just grieving the old and it’s like, okay, who is this new person? And how does she express herself? How does she show up in the world? Yeah.
Kate (32:32)
Yeah. Yeah. And, and what I really heard you say too, and I think this is important to know is that, especially when we’ve been operating in such a way, like out here in the masculine, for us to even find that middle ground, the pendulum has to swing all the way out to the full feminine, right? We’ve got to go to the depths of that to surrender, to let go, to be able to release whatever we’re releasing ourselves from. When the time is right, you know, when we’ve fully nurtured ourselves in that experience to come to know it, you know, healed in this opposite, we can swing back and the pendulum can find that beautiful middle ground of now I know what the feminine is. And I know what the masculine is. I know my edge here of when I’m crossing up to masculine because I’ve been there. And I also know to when you know, maybe there’s not too much feminine, I’m sure there is, but you know what I mean? When we’re just waiting to receive and not doing any of the actions.
So you’ve now had this beautiful experience that gives you this, this knowingness of how I wish to be, where my edges are. And, you know, Amanda and I both spoke to both two boundaries, where we get to then take on more of that self responsibility of knowing, okay, this, this is too much here and that is too much there. And, and, who I am now in that space is a greater awareness of how I want to show up in the world. How much of my masculine I’m going to operate from learning how I can balance that with my feminine side. And I think what I really beautifully have seen you do, especially as you now go on to open your studio is, is I’ve seen that shift of you, you so beautifully embody the feminine, it radiates out of the sound of your voice, you know, how you are, how you look, you’re just one of the most beautiful human specimens.
And now I see you really claiming your path of, yes, I’ve been in that masculine, I’ve had my feminine moments and now I’m kind of bringing the marrying the two to now be of service and bring this understanding, this learning, this knowledge of how we can dance through life with that sense of wholeness, I guess I really, you know, would put that word to it for you.
Cause I know that you’re now doing work with people one -on -one, as we said in your introduction, that it’s not just about the training and the, you know, getting your body into a healthy state, but it’s so much more of who we are. There’s, there’s the soul. There’s our, there’s, there’s this other part of us that I think, you know, we’ve said is a big thing that you’re, we awaken to through our awakening journey is that we are a soul as well. And that that has a very different quality. Creating that connection with our soul is, I think, one of the most profound experiences, which, you know, when we are able to take that responsibility, face the ego, grieve through those ideas of who we are, that’s what’s kind of left in that vulnerable space is a greater connection. Would you say that that’s something that you really could speak to and was your experience when, as you’ve kind of delayered with these, you know, facing of your grief and each of those challenges that you faced through claiming your authenticity.
Nadine (35:53)
Yeah, absolutely Kate. Deeper connection with self and then deeper connection with divine, divine mother, divine father, all that is absolutely there’s a constant, there’s just a constant plugged inness, you know. For me, on the yogic path, there’s a very specific sadhana or spiritual practice in the mornings and I’ve done that for many, many years.
And the last year, last year and a half, I just had this whisper of my heart, just like, how can I live every moment, every moment connected, every moment just in the embrace of spirit, of myself, capital S, that’s my cat in the background, apologies, of God, of however we relate to higher power, you know? So connection with all that is and self is, it cannot be for me personally, in my experience, it can’t be separation in that. And I feel like that is when I start touching the knowing of what it is to when I say, just say enlightenment, when I see me, in you, you in me, God in me, God in you, you know all of that and just that I sometimes I feel like I see love through eyes shaped like this, like complete wholeheartedly in this presence, in this beingness.
So yeah, I hope that was the answer. I answered your question, but yeah, just that deep connection of that and take me back to the challenges when one that I did forget was loneliness, you know? I love being alone. And sometimes in the beginning of our journeys, we feel very lonely. We feel very lonely because we started moving away from what’s not aligned with us anymore. That might be circles of people as well and activities we might have enjoyed in the past. Like, this is my path. For instance, I completely stopped drinking alcohol in 2018 and became vegetarian and it just felt right for me to do that. And also loud music, all of everything I just became was like, can I just live in nature under that tree please? And it just became very lonely and I was longing for sisters for so long, for so long, just asking. Can I please have sisters on this journey? It would be so wonderful to have that. And keep on asking and keep on being grateful because it’s coming. It’s coming. The aligned partners, aligned friendships, aligned family is there and we will find each other always. It just is.
Amanda (38:55)
Something that I think is really beautiful and I think you both spoke to it is that, you know, we can go through these really hard challenges, right? Where we have to detach from our identities of who we were kind of rigidly believing who we are. And then going through that initiation, right? Where we’re having to like ask all these deep questions.
But the beauty that I see that comes out of it is that we can then go on this journey where we’re not so attached to the current, like who we are currently, we know that we’re gonna change, right? So like what you’re talking about Kate, about swinging to the, pendulum to the feminine and then swinging back to the the middle you know in, you know there’s different iterations of us along the way. It’s like we’re open to whatever version wants to be right now in this moment in time and it gets a lot easier to follow the path of our soul, to live in alignment with what feels true and that can look like different versions as we go, right? You know, like what you’re doing currently that can change but because we’re connected, we’ve learned how to connect and know what’s true for us like going through that egg exercise like you. That was a skill that you learned to connect and to know.
And then so, life just becomes so much more interesting in a way that it’s like, what version am I gonna be in a year by living from this heart -centered, heart -open space? What version of me wants to come through? And because we’re not so attached to a version of who we think we should be, we allow ourselves to step into that. And I feel like that’s what you’ve done and that’s what you’re continuing to do as you explore your practices.
So, you know, we have these conversations about it being hard, right? These hard things, but there’s like this big light, I think, that is there for all of us to step into. And so therefore it’s like, even in the hardest moments, like remembering that there’s this light ahead of us, I think it can be really helpful. Yeah, thank you for inspiring this idea.
Nadine (41:23)
Thanks Amanda, it’s so true. I appreciate that. Yeah, and for anyone that’s listening, it might be like, oh, that sounds like a slogfest. And so much contentment, so much peace, so much joy is the absolute ever -continuing reward of this journey. And it’s so beautiful. And the people we connect with, wow.
Tthe conversations we have, everything. Kate you use this word a lot and it’s the word I use so much too, is nurturing. Everything feels nurturing and nourished and just like rich soil where the seeds are just ready to be planted. So if you’re listening, be encouraged. It’s gooder, it’s gooder, it’s amazing. Yeah.
Kate (42:17)
Yeah. Are there any other gifts of this experience you’d like to share with our listener?
Because, you know, you have mentioned this is deeper self love and you know, what we’ve just shared here is I think a beautiful thing that we come to is we are more content with who we are and where we are in any given moment, knowing that sometimes there’s hard moments and yet we’re not thrown as much anymore by that. Like we accept that there’s an acceptance of every part of the journey and almost a welcoming in a, in a strange way of like, oh, we’re getting a bit hard now. There’s a growth on the horizon. Sometimes, sometimes.
But again, as you said Amanda, I think there’s just one of the beautiful things is and it speaks to our feeling of just being more present and in a sense, like almost embodied and living truly moment to moment, knowing that there is a guiding force that there, we do have a journey and a path that our soul is here to have to experience. There is a higher purpose for it all.
And so there’s this almost like, I feel like I want to say like a relaxing back into what is, you know, when we just meet life and we allow it and I’m like, Oh, okay. Now this, Oh, and this, and then it’s sometimes it’s high and sometimes it’s low and there’s less of that attachment to having to have it be awesome. And, you know, feeling like we fall apart when it’s not,
You know, I sort of feel like that’s what we’ve just had a chat about. What are the things would you say Nadine have been some of the beautiful gifts that have come from your experience? And then also I’d like you to continue there with any other takeaways that you feel, you know, you’d love to share with our listeners that have been big ones for you about the awakening path and, and from your experience.
Nadine (44:07)
Gifts. I love that wording of it, gifts. You definitely spoke into that completely, the trust, not just trust in self, but also trust in the guidance comes through.
And Amanda, exactly what you said is like, we might have a goal or a vision where we would like to be in a year from now and also trusting that it might look completely different. And we, our cage is not rattled by that.
I think one of the beautiful gifts touching on what you said, Kate, is presence. Being able to be present with someone and it’s not about you anymore. It’s not about us anymore. It’s truly about service and the joy that comes from just sitting with someone, seeing them and just hearing them, seeing them and just feeling how their essence is coming alive when they are being loved on, just wholly and just the healing that comes through that. It’s like a transference. It’s nothing that we have to do, it’s just the being of who we are and being in that love. That for me is definitely a beautiful gift and then I think that the, for me personally, in my own journey, it’s the gift of feeling so connected with nature. It’s just indescribable. I know, forever, since I was a child, I’ve always been enchanted by everything of nature. And I thought of it just like, oh, that’s just the thing, you know? But now understanding there’s all these beautiful green beings and all these beautiful animals, every kingdom, has a message for us, there’s guidance in everything. And there’s almost like a playful game to tap into that and to see the guidance that comes in from all the angles.
Again, for me, I think my message for me, the lesson that I had to learn is there’s no templates, there’s no recipes, it’s just for one single person. There’s guidance that comes through every single facet of life. And I love being open to that. It’s like, I call it magic. It’s just the magic of being alive. There’s just, there’s little breadcrumbs everywhere. And I love to follow that. And especially if it brings joy and it brings upliftment, I’m there for it.
Gifts, the alignment to, there’s a deep alignment that comes with living in our soul’s truth. And of course it’s a practice and it’s a practice and it’s a practice. There’s ego sometimes it’s always there and sometimes we forget. There’s an alignment with virtues like honesty, like contentment, like, you know, truly respecting life in all forms, love, compassion. There’s these
Universal principles that we come into alignment to when we’re on this path. And I honor that, I honor that deeply.
And there’s a respect that comes from for teachers. Whether it’s wise women, whether it’s wise men, whether it’s again the plant or animal kingdoms or heavenly bodies. There’s just so much deep reverence for life.
And I think the last one, it’s still a practice sometimes is knowing that this body and this mind is going to end one day. We are all gonna die. We’re all gonna die, whether it’s today, whether it’s in the near future. This life is going to end. And this beautiful gift that we are living is going to end and that’s okay because there’s a whole new journey that lies ahead on the other side. So the gift of understanding that, so the fear of death, it’s almost like there’s no more, Kate you mentioned that there’s a relaxing in what is. So whether it’s a death of loved ones, which I’ve had plenty of over the last few years, is there’s an understanding. It’s like, ah, so happy for them, they’re going home. So it’s like, and of course the grief of not having my Dad passed away in 2020, that was a beautiful shift for me as well. But it’s a knowing that. So happy for them. Wow. So yeah that that’s a few of the things that I can, that I can touch on in that.
And then you ask if there’s any other takeaways. I always ask myself what would I tell myself from seven years ago? What would I tell her? What’s the message that I will share with her to make her feel more encouraged and comforted on this journey? And that is to truly, truly trust in your heart, truly tune in. The heart speaks softly and with love. And the heart, again, when I talk about my heart, I talk about my higher self, truer self, true essence, soul spirit.
And the mind blames, shames, judges skills and seeks pleasure, but the heart is, there’s a whisper there and there’s a like, come, let’s go. Just keep on trusting that, keep on trusting that and trusting in confidence also. Allow your voice to be heard, whoever you are, just allow your voice to be heard. It’s so easy to hide in the forms, especially talking about the kids main character energy but in a loving way, in a loving way and in a wise way, not for validation seeking, but truly just be of service and be in love with life.
Kate (49:44)
Amanda, anything that you would like to ask or share before I get Nadine to share a bit about her work in the world?
Amanda (49:50)
Yeah, I just wanted to come back full circle to what we talked about at the beginning with like self responsibility and how something that like came to me and it seems like you’ve done so beautifully is taking self responsibility but from a place of self compassion and love, not from a place of shame or judgment.
I think that in a lot of the religions, it’s like shame and judgment goes along with repentance,is that the right word? Yeah, right. And that goes, it’s such a polarity, right? When we think about you know, doing something maybe that’s, we don’t feel great about. And then what comes with it on the other side is like shame and judgment and guilt.
But when we move into a place of love and forgiveness and self -compassion, it’s like what you spoke to Kate, about the wholeness that, to be able to look at all aspects of ourselves, right? And not have to, and to be able to see it all. And I think that’s what this path is leading us towards.It’s leading to be able to see all of us and not have to hide any part of us that maybe didn’t live up to maybe our minds expectations, right?
And so I think that’s what you illustrated so beautifully that like, this is the path that, the awakening path, it’s like coming to that place of heart centeredness, heart openness, where we can love all of who we are and then it could be more authentic. And so thank you for so authentically and vulnerably sharing your journey, because it’s, you can see that you’re really embodying and living what you’ve taken on to this journey that you’ve been on. So thank you.
Nadine (51:41)
Thanks Amanda, I really appreciate it. Thank you so much.
Kate (51:45)
Yeah, I’ll just second that because you just, to me, exude what you’ve learned. You know, you’re an incredible example of the embodiment and almost like this wholehearted acceptance of the process and the journey. And you’ve really turned it into, you know, your gold by hearing that call, answering the call as challenging as it was to change, to create a new life, to be more authentic.
And you know, we talked about that is challenging and it’s not easy. And yet those gifts you’ve integrated that so beautifully into who you are being and how you are showing up in the world. So just want to say thank you for that because you are an incredible guiding light for others on awakening paths and just simply those you’re working with, you know, as in any work you do, you speak a lot too about seeing other people and, you know, how that feels energetically. And so. You know, that’s a gift that you are giving to the world. You know, I can feel it here across a computer screen, on our podcast, and I can see it through your Instagram. It’s such genuine and it’s, you’re a beautiful example of the beauty of an awakening journey. So thank you for shining your light in the world and, and being you.
Nadine (53:04)
Thank you, I appreciate that so much. Thank you. Thank you.
Kate (53:11)
You’re welcome. And so just to wrap up here, I’d love for you to give you an opportunity to share about what are doing, the work you’re doing in the world, your studio, so we can let the world know how. If they’re in LA, they can come and work with you, but I’ll give you the floor to talk about that.
Nadine (53:19)
Yeah. Oh, yes. OK. Yeah. Thank you. I appreciate that. So we’re in the heart of Los Angeles. My goodness. The lions den I call it. It’s like God, please take me to nature. And then I come right here, close to Hollywood. We have a beautiful little studio. It’s a strength training, yoga, sound healing studio in Los Angeles. We as my husband and I Ricardo.
He does incredible work with men. I just, I love women hearts. I just love just being in the space uplifting And so that’s the face -to -face work here. I do a monthly women’s circle. We just sit and we share and not just share, but also co -create in the energetic as well. And then my offers to clients is 1 on 1 and like I mentioned, it’s so easy just to be a template, running a template. And you have experience of that, Kate, with me, actually, you started earlier in my career together, where it’s just a nutrition plan and just a workout program. And there you go. You know, and here we are in 2024. We know there’s so much more, so much more in this body and this mind than just training and just nutrition.
So my job is to help you figure out what your essence are, what sparks joy for you, what brings you alive, what makes you feel aliveness. If it’s training or it’s not, I don’t care what it is for you. I just want to find a way for you to move energy through the body, whether it’s through breath, whether it’s through creativity, whether it’s being in nature, and just bring this whole person honour.
So it’s just a journey of, a beautiful journey of coaching, whether it’s three months, whether it’s six months, whether it’s nine months, every journey is so different. And that’s what we explore together wherever she is. And from coaches to coaches, these days it feels like the language is to create a group coaching, da, da, da, all the things.
And this is another way where I had to lean into what my voice is and what my heart alignment is right in the season. And I, for the life of me, it just doesn’t feel good for me at this moment to have a big offering for the world and a membership and all of that. For me, it’s in the season of my life. It is that deep connection, the one on one deep connection. So every month I only have four spaces available.
So as every month, as every month roll by, it’s only four spaces that I have available to work with women in, in the very intimate, closed settings. So that’s, that’s where I’m at with my offerings at the moment. Yes.
Kate (56:18)
Amazing. Your one -to -one work, do you do that online as well? Or is it all in person?
Nadine (56:24)
Yes, online. Yeah, I do have international clients as well. And then yeah, in person, if anyone ever comes here, you’re so welcome.
Amanda (56:32)
And we’ll have a link to your website, right? We can link to and put it in the show notes for anyone who’s listening so they can get in touch with Nadine.
Kate (56:41)
Yeah and experience the magic of Nadine online and in person. Exactly. Exactly.
Nadine (56:41)
Thanks Amanda, I appreciate that.
And then that translates to experience the magic of yourself in person. That’s truly my heart. Every woman to come alive to the magic, to her true essence. Oh, it’s so easy for us to have role models and to have people to look at that we aspire to, whether it’s celebrity, whether it’s someone on Instagram or social media. And here we are. We are our own most beautiful, most beautiful magical beings. And I just want to turn those eyes inwards.
And just like, like, you know, when you, when you have a volume on the volume dial, whatever, the old people knows this, or in the car store at least, or volume buttons, okay, turn that shit up. Exactly. And just come alive to your, oh my word, your own beautiful magic. Yeah, that’s it.
Kate (57:37)
Yeah, amazing, incredible work that you are doing and needed because, you know, this is a ripple effect of us all shining that light that creates a very different world.
So thank you for what you are doing and thank you for being a guest on our podcast. We hope everyone enjoyed this conversation. Please do go and check out the links for Nadine’s work and we will chat to you in the next episode.
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Kate & amanda - Your hosts on this conversational journey!
Meet your hosts
Both Amanda & Kate have been through and are still going through their own awakening journeys, which, in fact, the creation of this podcast is a continuation of their awakening unfoldings.
While being located in very different geographical regions of Earth, they have brought their energy together through the gift of technology to explore the ideas and experiences of the awakening journey, which has transformed each of their lives in unique ways.
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